I Want to Smell like my Husband


Is your sense of smell a strong sense for you? Mine is linked so closely with my memories, add in my visual mind and I can be right back to anywhere I want to be – just from one sniff. The smell of Nasi cooking will bring me back to my mother’s kitchen, the smell of a freshly cleaned floor brings me back to my summer camp days, my old perfume takes me to that sense of freedom of my early twenties – but my favourite is the scent of my husband, that smell makes me feel safe.

My husband travels for work quite often, not always overnight, but he’s away for a least one evening, if not two per week. Those are the long days. (Who can relate to this?!) There was one trip a couple of weeks ago where he was away for multiple nights. By the end of the second evening, I was so lonely. For those who know me, you know that I am a talkative person – I LOVE conversation, interactions, and social gatherings – I thrive on these – but I wither away when I am alone. I feel weak, trapped and desolate. (Hence why this time of postpartum has given me a run for my money.) It was a Tuesday night, my husband Face-Timed me as he got settled back into his hotel room. He could tell by my face (and the fact that I was in bed at 7:30pm) that I was not doing so well. I asked him how his day was, he walked me through it then he kindly asked me how my day was, I broke down and blurted out “I’m wearing your deodorant”. He burst out laughing. “WHAT?! Why are you wearing that?!” “It’s so that when I roll over, I get a whiff of you.” I said through the tears. He couldn’t keep a straight face for the rest of the conversation. But the truth of the matter is, sometimes all I need is that little tiny reminder that I am loved, safe, protected and most importantly not alone – even when I am lonely.

In Isaiah 43:1-2, the Lord promises to be with us, through thick and thin, though loneliness and abundance.

Now this is what the Lord says—
the one who created you, Jacob,
and the one who formed you, Israel—
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by your name; you are mine.
I will be with you
when you pass through the waters,
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not overwhelm you.
You will not be scorched
when you walk through the fire,
and the flame will not burn you.

Isaiah 43:1-2

Although the smell of my husband gives me the physical sense of home, the Lord gives me a permanent affirmation of home. “I will be with you” – a statement of true love.

Now excuse me while I go and take a shower with my husbands body wash.

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